Two chicks reviewing Louisville one venue at a time. Now serving up Haunted Reviews!!
Saturday, September 28, 2013
Haunted Review - 7th Street Haunt
Okay, it's no big secret that I'm a fan of this haunt. This being only their second year in operation, they are back and quickly becoming one of the most talked about haunts in the area. Well, at least in the circles I run in, but I'm willing to bet it's pretty popular with the normal folks of the world too.
I was able to meet with Travis Boling, owner of the haunt and nightmare expert. We had a lot of fun and he let me in on a few secrets planned for next year that no doubt with bring this haunt to even higher levels of terror. A lot of focus this year was on building the haunt out, and now that they have the layout and design in place, next comes more props and perhaps an exterior facelift? The work that's gone into the haunt so far has really been such a drastic change that I didn't even recognize it! Travis admitted they only took a couple of weeks off at the end of last year's haunting season before beginning the tedious work that goes into remodeling and rebuilding the nightmares. This, my friends, is a haunt that has no limits and moving at warp speed to become one of the most loved and feared haunts in Louisville. We had so much fun, I only wish I'd woken with a voice and without a sore throat. Or the alcohol-free hangover from too much fun.
So without further ado...
Ashley's Take
The Set Design
Okay, this is the first haunt where I've actually had to stop and run my fingers over the walls and the decorations (kids, don't try this, I was soon attacked by the walls and it's STRONGLY warned that you don't touch the walls or the actors or anything else! Don't make him press the red button!!) The only downfall here was the video in the beginning. Both Aly and I are hard of hearing, and we had no clue what was happening in the video. Then again, it was loud with other haunted house sounds all around us and turning it up much louder probably would have been distracting to other parts of the haunt. Still, it wasn't a major distraction, we just told the soldier we couldn't hear it and he explained it. I have a feeling we missed out on the plot of the dangerous zone we were about to walk into, but I don't feel like I missed out on much. Everything was meticulously done up and the detail to each room and scene was intricate. The rooms and scenes had a great flow and transition, too, making everything very cohesive and connected. I really dig the design and props this year.
The Props
There were a lot of props in this year's design, and even though owner Travis revealed that next year was going to be a big addition to the props department, I still thought the props this year were very cool. From the lovely dinner table to the exquisite
The Actors
Oh, the actors. These guys got me. The actors are statuesque and completely immobile until they're ready to scare you, and when they do, even if they don't do the "BOO" factor, they are pretty darn scary. A lot of these actors blended into the walls and scenes so well that you didn't know they were there or thought they were props because they were excellent at their job. I have to give massive props to the clown that almost put me into the hospital with a heart attack. I actually threw myself into a corner and screamed my head off. Loudly. And repeatedly. While my "best friend" and family laughed at me. Kudos to the hideously terrifying clown, and thanks SO much for the dreams from last night.
The Scare Factor
Although it did rely heavily on the shock factor, this haunt had a good deal of piss-your-pants fear. (Case in point-the clown.) Sure, a lot of times these actors were stationary and popped out at you, but it wasn't just the fact that they popped out to scare you, it's that they were friggin horrifying. Some of the sounds they made too...they didn't have to pop out and scare you at 7th Street. They just have to sit there and make an unnatural noise that makes your blood run cold. Plus, they built the anticipation of not knowing what was coming and not bombarding you with nonstop BOOs. It was both refreshing and nightmare-inducing. Literally.
The Shock Factor
I've already mentioned it a couple of times, but I have to really say it again, these guys had great timing and were unpredictable. We didn't know which ones were props, which were real people, which were moving, or which were stationary. It kept us guessing and wondering what the hell was coming next. Wonderful mixture of shock and fear.
The Originality
This is one of the very few truly original plots in Louisville, basing the whole haunt on the idea of this long-since forgotten town of Fort Harmony, KY, and the horrific events that took place there. Now, here's where I feel we lost a little because we didn't get the history or background from the video, but it wasn't hard to deduce what happened to Ft. Harmony, for the most part. While we don't know how it happened, the combination of the medical aspect and undead aspect is really truly phenomenal.
Other Factors to Consider
This haunt may only be in its second year, but the genius behind it and powering it are seasoned experts, bringing you to the brink of insanity and terror, and they only keep getting better. The difference between 2012 and 2013 is comparable to the difference between a fruit fly and a Wooly Mammoth. Really, wtf?? It's not the same in any way, except to be terrifying. I'm genuinely impressed with the progress made and was promised next year is going to be even better. I can't wait. (Is it opening weekend 2014 yet??)
Overall Entertainment
Man, just from the moment you get your tickets to the moment you come flying out of the door, there was nonstop enjoyment. You get to look stupid and take a funny picture with props when you get inside, then you get to meet the Mayor, who gives you a little intro and tells you a story before sending you in to meet the army guy. From there, it's a bajillion screams and a lot of fun all the way to the end. All in all, I'd give this haunt a 4.5 Star rating. It's really just been a screaming good time, and we'll definitely be coming back for more!
Now, for Aly's feedback...
Aly's Two Cents
Haunted Review - The Devil's Attic
Whew. I slept in late with a sore throat and exhaustion today. You'll find out why in this and the next review! This time, though, Aly and I brought in 2 extra victims-my baby brother Darren and his girlfriend (aw hell, she's already a sister to me anyway) Justis. And they provided some great insight and a good laugh at their screams. I've found that Justis is petrified of chainsaws. And that, my friends, is friggin' hilarious!
So, first on our night of terror, we hit up The Devil's Attic. First off, though, I gotta give a big thank you to Jason Besemann, who met with me beforehand and let me photograph some of his outside actors for the blog. He's awesome, as are all the employees, so major thanks for your hospitality and kindness!!
Okay, now for the review.
Ashley's Take:
The Set Design
You know, I don't know if it was the RedBull or what, but the scenery looked really awesome, and a little different from last year. There were some very awesome scenes in here that actually induced fear enough for the four of us to form a chain (with me thrust to the front) to make our way through the maze of rooms adorned with some pretty intricate details. A lot of work goes into this design every year, and not only does it show, it pays off. I really loved the room with the...well, I can't spoil it, but let's just say the Jackal scared the bejeebers out of me.
The Actors
Honestly, I've come to think Louisville has some of the most talented actors and actresses out there. I wasn't let down in any way by the actors, who had me squawking and screaming as they threatened my life. The Devil...kudos for maintaining enough immobility to make me believe you really were a statue this year. And to the Priest and possessed woman who were forced to entertain the same single guy for a ridiculous time-that takes stamina to keep it up at that high of a level for that long. Many of the actors really did maintain their stillness and hide in the shadows enough to really frighten us. Once again, you impressed me.
The Props
I'm not going to lie on this one. I was so busy screaming my head off that I can barely remember any props. Not that it's a stab at the props, but the only things I can remember are the cricifix the Priest was holding, and the chainsaw. I'm sorry for not remembering everything else, but really, that's a compliment.
The Shock Factor
There were more shocks than I can even number off here. Again, another compliment to both the actors and the designers for making us scream too much to remember. There was a happy balance here, because this haunt doesn't rely solely on the "Boo" factor. There was just the right amount to keep us on our toes and wondering when something else was going to pop up, doing so at just the right moment when we were distracted by the other elements of the haunt.
The Scare Factor
Again, a beautiful balance between shock and actual fear, though I will admit I refused to let go of Aly's hand at one point and she may or may not have lost some circulation for a while. It was definitely creepy and you just get filled with that feeling of dread and impending doom. You really didn't know what to expect walking around from room to room, with the anticipation building for the next horrifying scene.
Originality
I hate it when there are a bajillion Jason's and Freddy's, though by now you probably know this. It makes it almost impossible to have movie characters at all without seeming cliche. Thankfully, The Devil's Attic made it happen and they weren't cliche. Older movies like Pumpkinhead and Thirteen Ghosts were strong influences, and Hellraiser, too. If you don't know those movies, fine, you'll figure them out soon. If you DO, then you're awesome and you can appreciate that these characters are done fabulously (as are the others!). But it was original. Sure, there was a chainsaw, and every haunted house from here to eternity will have a chainsaw at some point, typically at the end. But everything about this house from the layout to the costumes to the actors and everything in between was very creative and original.
Other Factors Influencing My Rating
There was an obviously drunk or otherwise uncomprehending man who was either lost from his group or going through alone, and he didn't seem to get the idea that you are supposed to keep moving, not stand there and make the poor actors continue entertaining you after you've gotten your scare. He backed us up and made us lose the scary factor for the last few rooms. It wasn't the haunt's fault. In fact, the reason I mention this is because one of the employees came through and basically ushered him along so he woulnd't keep making us wait. It was really cool of them to get this guy out of our way, and we really REALLY appreciate that!! I only wish there was a minimum inebriation level to enter haunted houses, hehe!
The haunt was way longer this year than it was last year. (Well, in my opinion, it could still very well be the RedBull affecting my perception.) I recall last year it seemed to be about half as long, but this time, it seemed to just keep going, which is awesome. Because nobody wants to wait in line for a ten minute show, even if it's a fabulous ten minute show. This had to be longer. Either that, or it was so scary, it just seemed longer...
Overall Entertainment
This haunt really impressed me. It impressed all of us, really. The fun began as soon as you got inside the haunt and didn't end until you were outside again. It was fun, it was scary, and either I'm being very lenient or everyone is stepping it up this year, I can't find much of anything I didn't like about this haunt. I have to score it at 4.5 Stars. This was truly amazing and I screamed my throat out. Literally. My throat is killing me today and I woke up with half my voice. It was a huge improvement over last year's review, and I'm DYING to see what the coming years bring!!
Let's hear what Aly has to say!
Aly's Two Cents
So, first on our night of terror, we hit up The Devil's Attic. First off, though, I gotta give a big thank you to Jason Besemann, who met with me beforehand and let me photograph some of his outside actors for the blog. He's awesome, as are all the employees, so major thanks for your hospitality and kindness!!
These guys were Awesome. Really awesome. And creepy. Lots of creepy.
They really liked Aly and Justis. Poor Darren might have some competition...
* * * * *
Ashley's Take:
The Set Design
You know, I don't know if it was the RedBull or what, but the scenery looked really awesome, and a little different from last year. There were some very awesome scenes in here that actually induced fear enough for the four of us to form a chain (with me thrust to the front) to make our way through the maze of rooms adorned with some pretty intricate details. A lot of work goes into this design every year, and not only does it show, it pays off. I really loved the room with the...well, I can't spoil it, but let's just say the Jackal scared the bejeebers out of me.
The Actors
Honestly, I've come to think Louisville has some of the most talented actors and actresses out there. I wasn't let down in any way by the actors, who had me squawking and screaming as they threatened my life. The Devil...kudos for maintaining enough immobility to make me believe you really were a statue this year. And to the Priest and possessed woman who were forced to entertain the same single guy for a ridiculous time-that takes stamina to keep it up at that high of a level for that long. Many of the actors really did maintain their stillness and hide in the shadows enough to really frighten us. Once again, you impressed me.
The Props
I'm not going to lie on this one. I was so busy screaming my head off that I can barely remember any props. Not that it's a stab at the props, but the only things I can remember are the cricifix the Priest was holding, and the chainsaw. I'm sorry for not remembering everything else, but really, that's a compliment.
The Shock Factor
There were more shocks than I can even number off here. Again, another compliment to both the actors and the designers for making us scream too much to remember. There was a happy balance here, because this haunt doesn't rely solely on the "Boo" factor. There was just the right amount to keep us on our toes and wondering when something else was going to pop up, doing so at just the right moment when we were distracted by the other elements of the haunt.
The Scare Factor
Again, a beautiful balance between shock and actual fear, though I will admit I refused to let go of Aly's hand at one point and she may or may not have lost some circulation for a while. It was definitely creepy and you just get filled with that feeling of dread and impending doom. You really didn't know what to expect walking around from room to room, with the anticipation building for the next horrifying scene.
Originality
I hate it when there are a bajillion Jason's and Freddy's, though by now you probably know this. It makes it almost impossible to have movie characters at all without seeming cliche. Thankfully, The Devil's Attic made it happen and they weren't cliche. Older movies like Pumpkinhead and Thirteen Ghosts were strong influences, and Hellraiser, too. If you don't know those movies, fine, you'll figure them out soon. If you DO, then you're awesome and you can appreciate that these characters are done fabulously (as are the others!). But it was original. Sure, there was a chainsaw, and every haunted house from here to eternity will have a chainsaw at some point, typically at the end. But everything about this house from the layout to the costumes to the actors and everything in between was very creative and original.
Other Factors Influencing My Rating
There was an obviously drunk or otherwise uncomprehending man who was either lost from his group or going through alone, and he didn't seem to get the idea that you are supposed to keep moving, not stand there and make the poor actors continue entertaining you after you've gotten your scare. He backed us up and made us lose the scary factor for the last few rooms. It wasn't the haunt's fault. In fact, the reason I mention this is because one of the employees came through and basically ushered him along so he woulnd't keep making us wait. It was really cool of them to get this guy out of our way, and we really REALLY appreciate that!! I only wish there was a minimum inebriation level to enter haunted houses, hehe!
The haunt was way longer this year than it was last year. (Well, in my opinion, it could still very well be the RedBull affecting my perception.) I recall last year it seemed to be about half as long, but this time, it seemed to just keep going, which is awesome. Because nobody wants to wait in line for a ten minute show, even if it's a fabulous ten minute show. This had to be longer. Either that, or it was so scary, it just seemed longer...
Overall Entertainment
This haunt really impressed me. It impressed all of us, really. The fun began as soon as you got inside the haunt and didn't end until you were outside again. It was fun, it was scary, and either I'm being very lenient or everyone is stepping it up this year, I can't find much of anything I didn't like about this haunt. I have to score it at 4.5 Stars. This was truly amazing and I screamed my throat out. Literally. My throat is killing me today and I woke up with half my voice. It was a huge improvement over last year's review, and I'm DYING to see what the coming years bring!!
Let's hear what Aly has to say!
Aly's Two Cents
Labels:
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Thursday, September 26, 2013
Aly and Ashley Make a Decision...Hell Froze Over
We finally decided on which haunts to visit!! Haha, it only took a week. Brace yourselves...are you ready for the big reveal?? Are you sure? Really really truly sure??
I'm sorry, it's late and my brain has checked out...
The haunts we're visiting tomorrow in no particular order are:
The Devil's Attic
&
7th Street Haunt!!
Woo hoo!! And my brother and his girlfriend are joining us for these haunts, so we have fresh meat to help us rate the haunts. This is gonna be fun.
Mwahahahahahahahaaaa!!!
Monday, September 23, 2013
Our Next Review Victims...
Damn...174 hits in one day. You guys rock!! No, seriously, thank you. :)
So, we're taking votes on what haunts we should visit next. Could be as early as next weekend, but may have to wait until the weekend after. Cause, ya know...regular bills regrettably take precedence over haunted houses...lol! So here's the grand list of potential haunts (in no particular order); chime in and tell us where we should go next!! Don't see your favorite haunt? Suggest it!!
So, we're taking votes on what haunts we should visit next. Could be as early as next weekend, but may have to wait until the weekend after. Cause, ya know...regular bills regrettably take precedence over haunted houses...lol! So here's the grand list of potential haunts (in no particular order); chime in and tell us where we should go next!! Don't see your favorite haunt? Suggest it!!
- Haunted Hotel
- Baxter Avenue Morgue
- Industrial Nightmare
- Waverly Hills
- 7th Street Haunt
- Devil's Attic
- Asylum Haunted Scream Park
- Deatherage Ice House
- Field of Screams
- Nightmare Forest
- Fear Fair (in Indiana)
- Rails of Death
- Drive-In of Terror
- Grim Trails
It's a longish list, but I truly hate to leave anyone out!! Fear Fair is a rather long hike, so I'm hoping like hell if y'all say that one, that it's worth it!! :P
Okay, and....GO!!!
Sunday, September 22, 2013
Haunted Review - Dead End Hotel
Aly and I paid a visit to the brand spanking new Dead End Hotel in Shepherdsville. We were hyped up about this brand spanking new attraction that seems to be brought to you by the creators of Nightmare Forest. Now, I admittedly haven't been to Nightmare Forest in quite some time, but from what I remember, it was a pretty good scare, so I was really excited about this new haunt. [Aly says: I thought Ash was going to pee herself when she realized we were going to the Dead End Hotel. She was PSYCHED!]
Sadly, it didn't live up to its creators reputation.
We arrived and there was far from crowded, so we were hoping for a similar experience as the previous haunt we'd visited. It was located in the same location as a haunt we'd visited several years back, and had sworn to never return to, although back then it was some kind of trail or something. It was not exciting enough to remember.
So, we again kept an open mind, especially after the big surprise from the other haunt. Here's how it went.
The Set Design
This place is called the Dead End Hotel, but calling the layout anything remotely resembling a hotel would be a stretch for any imagination. There was no flow to the haunt, most of the rooms were too dark to see any details, there were, like, three dining rooms and two bar areas, one bathroom, I think there was a bedroom somewhere, but it was very hard to tell, one room was just a guy shoving books off a shelf, it was hard to tell which way we were supposed to go, there were numerous times where I nearly faceplanted because there was no indication of a step up or down from one room to the next, and at the very end, two guys not in any costume or anything were waiting to shine a light down the back steps to exit. This wasn't a hotel, it was a trainwreck.
The Actors
The actors I'll give some credit, because they did honestly try, though some of them needed some extra acting lessons. Two guys actually scared me, one of which popped out and nearly grabbed my ankle when I wasn't expecting it, and one guy popped out of a wall (which I kinda saw coming) but the speed and agility of this guy was phenomenal. He must have been a ninja or Jedi or gymnast...there's no way he should have moved that fast and hopped up on the bar (counter? Table?) in one terrifying leap. He wanted my soul...thankfully Aly told him I didn't have one. I admitted to selling it for chocolate, and climbed the steps.
The Scare Factor
I'm torn here. Yes, we screamed a few times, and that made the haunt a little scarier than the first one, but it was 100% shock value and the "Boo" factor. There was no real fear, partially because the rooms-while being a total mess-were completely predictable. You could see the people getting ready to jump out at you, it was in obvious places and at obvious times, and every single room had a jumper, leaving no time to build anticipation for the next scare. I even started calling out which figures were going to pop out, which ones were dummies, and I wasn't in least bit frightened by anything, just startled a few times. Oh, and I have to point out that when the chainsaw guy chases "victims" out of the haunt and back to the line again, we kinda know where you are, and when the guys upstairs are shining lights down your way, we can totally see you as we head down the steps. There was absolutely zero surprise factor or scare factor with the chainsaw guy. Now, I'm not normally afraid of chainsaws anyway, but Aly gets a little skittish, and we just sauntered out of the gate with the chainsaw guy walking behind us, bored and disappointed.
Overall Entertainment
We stood in line for twenty minutes for a ten minute lackluster performance in a barely used section of the building that didn't elicit any real fear from anyone in our group. The best part about this haunt was the awesome duo we met standing in line that we adopted into our group. The only redeeming quality about this haunt was the effort of some of the actors and a few startles. I took into account it was opening weekend and may need to work out some kinks, but something these guys either failed to realize or undervalued the importance of is that on opening weekend, you need to bring your A-Game. You cannot-I repeat, CANNOT-fake your way through a haunted house or half-ass it. I know of a couple of haunts that in their first year nearly made me piss my pants, so this disappointing haunt has no excuses for why-on opening weekend-they failed to elicit any degree of fear from the victims.
The Score
I honestly feel I'm being generous with my score. I wanted so badly to enjoy this haunt and give it a good score, but if I'm being perfectly honest, I won't return. Ever. This is the second haunt on this property that has failed to be scary, and even if it is part of Danger Run in the future, I will bypass this haunt and complain to Danger Run about their low standards in choosing a haunt. I'll give them this year, because they had no way of knowing how horribly this would suck. But neither I nor Aly will be returning. You're welcome to disagree with me, and I hope you have a better experience than we did, but we give this a 2 star, only for the sake of the actors.
I really and truly hate giving a score this low. But it took ten minutes (maybe even less, it was super quick) and had there been a lengthy wait, this would be a horrible experience. As it stands, it was just a waste of a half hour that we won't repeat, and it kind of makes me leery about visiting Nightmare Forest now. If they're backing things like this, what new lows have they themselves reached? It's sad, really. There was such potential, and they completely missed the target in every possible way. Better luck in the future, Dead End (Not A) Hotel.
Aly's Two Cents
Seriously. It started with two guys smoking cigarettes leaning against the building at the entrance to the line... classy! The line wasn't too long. Both a good and bad sign, but it is Shepherdsville. Quiet town... While standing in line you can hear how the haunt ends... typical chainsaw "chasing" you... That doesn't scare me anymore... The guy did have a really cool ghillie suit though. And he said thank you when I told him. I was confused by the progression of rooms though. And that's a detail I just couldn't get over... The rooms were crowded and at one point we had no idea where to go. I had to ask a character throwing books to throw a book in the direction we were supposed to go and that worked. There were a lot of random steps that weren't marked and Ashley has bad balance as it is... so she almost fell... a lot... very dangerous. (Really, she falls when sitting down.) It did turn into a fun game when we tried to point out the characters before they attempted to scare us. It worked in most rooms. The only two fun rooms were where the guy surprised Ash and then the guy who was like a spider monkey. Kudos to that kid!
Overall, I would probably stay home. I think it took us longer to drive to Mt. Washington than it took us to get through the haunt. There's a happy medium between "I'm never getting out of this haunt!" and "Wait, was that it?" This was not worth money in my opinion. Two stars only because the two actors scared us and ghillie suit was pretty cool.
Sadly, it didn't live up to its creators reputation.
We arrived and there was far from crowded, so we were hoping for a similar experience as the previous haunt we'd visited. It was located in the same location as a haunt we'd visited several years back, and had sworn to never return to, although back then it was some kind of trail or something. It was not exciting enough to remember.
So, we again kept an open mind, especially after the big surprise from the other haunt. Here's how it went.
The Set Design
This place is called the Dead End Hotel, but calling the layout anything remotely resembling a hotel would be a stretch for any imagination. There was no flow to the haunt, most of the rooms were too dark to see any details, there were, like, three dining rooms and two bar areas, one bathroom, I think there was a bedroom somewhere, but it was very hard to tell, one room was just a guy shoving books off a shelf, it was hard to tell which way we were supposed to go, there were numerous times where I nearly faceplanted because there was no indication of a step up or down from one room to the next, and at the very end, two guys not in any costume or anything were waiting to shine a light down the back steps to exit. This wasn't a hotel, it was a trainwreck.
The Actors
The actors I'll give some credit, because they did honestly try, though some of them needed some extra acting lessons. Two guys actually scared me, one of which popped out and nearly grabbed my ankle when I wasn't expecting it, and one guy popped out of a wall (which I kinda saw coming) but the speed and agility of this guy was phenomenal. He must have been a ninja or Jedi or gymnast...there's no way he should have moved that fast and hopped up on the bar (counter? Table?) in one terrifying leap. He wanted my soul...thankfully Aly told him I didn't have one. I admitted to selling it for chocolate, and climbed the steps.
The Scare Factor
I'm torn here. Yes, we screamed a few times, and that made the haunt a little scarier than the first one, but it was 100% shock value and the "Boo" factor. There was no real fear, partially because the rooms-while being a total mess-were completely predictable. You could see the people getting ready to jump out at you, it was in obvious places and at obvious times, and every single room had a jumper, leaving no time to build anticipation for the next scare. I even started calling out which figures were going to pop out, which ones were dummies, and I wasn't in least bit frightened by anything, just startled a few times. Oh, and I have to point out that when the chainsaw guy chases "victims" out of the haunt and back to the line again, we kinda know where you are, and when the guys upstairs are shining lights down your way, we can totally see you as we head down the steps. There was absolutely zero surprise factor or scare factor with the chainsaw guy. Now, I'm not normally afraid of chainsaws anyway, but Aly gets a little skittish, and we just sauntered out of the gate with the chainsaw guy walking behind us, bored and disappointed.
Overall Entertainment
We stood in line for twenty minutes for a ten minute lackluster performance in a barely used section of the building that didn't elicit any real fear from anyone in our group. The best part about this haunt was the awesome duo we met standing in line that we adopted into our group. The only redeeming quality about this haunt was the effort of some of the actors and a few startles. I took into account it was opening weekend and may need to work out some kinks, but something these guys either failed to realize or undervalued the importance of is that on opening weekend, you need to bring your A-Game. You cannot-I repeat, CANNOT-fake your way through a haunted house or half-ass it. I know of a couple of haunts that in their first year nearly made me piss my pants, so this disappointing haunt has no excuses for why-on opening weekend-they failed to elicit any degree of fear from the victims.
The Score
I honestly feel I'm being generous with my score. I wanted so badly to enjoy this haunt and give it a good score, but if I'm being perfectly honest, I won't return. Ever. This is the second haunt on this property that has failed to be scary, and even if it is part of Danger Run in the future, I will bypass this haunt and complain to Danger Run about their low standards in choosing a haunt. I'll give them this year, because they had no way of knowing how horribly this would suck. But neither I nor Aly will be returning. You're welcome to disagree with me, and I hope you have a better experience than we did, but we give this a 2 star, only for the sake of the actors.
I really and truly hate giving a score this low. But it took ten minutes (maybe even less, it was super quick) and had there been a lengthy wait, this would be a horrible experience. As it stands, it was just a waste of a half hour that we won't repeat, and it kind of makes me leery about visiting Nightmare Forest now. If they're backing things like this, what new lows have they themselves reached? It's sad, really. There was such potential, and they completely missed the target in every possible way. Better luck in the future, Dead End (Not A) Hotel.
Aly's Two Cents
Seriously. It started with two guys smoking cigarettes leaning against the building at the entrance to the line... classy! The line wasn't too long. Both a good and bad sign, but it is Shepherdsville. Quiet town... While standing in line you can hear how the haunt ends... typical chainsaw "chasing" you... That doesn't scare me anymore... The guy did have a really cool ghillie suit though. And he said thank you when I told him. I was confused by the progression of rooms though. And that's a detail I just couldn't get over... The rooms were crowded and at one point we had no idea where to go. I had to ask a character throwing books to throw a book in the direction we were supposed to go and that worked. There were a lot of random steps that weren't marked and Ashley has bad balance as it is... so she almost fell... a lot... very dangerous. (Really, she falls when sitting down.) It did turn into a fun game when we tried to point out the characters before they attempted to scare us. It worked in most rooms. The only two fun rooms were where the guy surprised Ash and then the guy who was like a spider monkey. Kudos to that kid!
Overall, I would probably stay home. I think it took us longer to drive to Mt. Washington than it took us to get through the haunt. There's a happy medium between "I'm never getting out of this haunt!" and "Wait, was that it?" This was not worth money in my opinion. Two stars only because the two actors scared us and ghillie suit was pretty cool.
Haunted Review - Cobb's Haunt
We went to two haunted houses, and boy, are we flippin tired!!! But we survived (barely) and are here to tell you what we lived through!
The first haunted house Aly and I visited was Cobb's Haunt. Now, a little secret that I didn't let slip to the folks there...we had visited this haunt a couple or three years ago, and we'd sworn we wouldn't come back. We had been very disappointed last time and it was one of the few haunts on the list of places we wouldn't willingly revisit. So when we pulled up and realized where we were, we were initially hesitant, but went in with an open mind. After all, a lot of time had passed.
We were pleasantly surprised.
Now, I won't lie, I woke up with aching muscles that I had long since forgotten that I had. My hips and quads and calves have felt all day as though someone was slicing them open with razor blades. You WILL get a workout!! I swear, I'm a fluffy girl and I'm pretty sure I had a mild heart attack by the time we finally reached the end. Literally, I woke up to take the dog out this morning and rolled back over to wake the hubby up to take him out-I couldn't move. So make sure you stretch and do a quick warm-up before tackling this crazy maze, and pee before you go in!! This place is enormous (though I'm not 100% positive this is all there is to the haunt, the pic just doesn't do it justice at ALL!) and there are no port-o-potties around (but there are really nice restrooms, very clean!).
Set Design
Okay, there's two things about this set design that really stood out to me. First, it's a real friggin maze. I don't think I've ever been in anything quite like this, where no matter what way you turned, it was the wrong way. We kept coming back to the same place and it was frustrating fun, while simultaneously exhausting. It was a bit long, and for those who are good at figuring out mazes or physically fit it probably didn't seem so bad. But I'm neither, and nor is Aly, and apparently neither were the couple we'd gone into the maze with. It took us...an hour? Or close to it. You get your money's worth for the amount of time you spend in there.
The second thing that stood out was that we got our own tour guide, so aptly nicknamed "Horny Man." Hey, he was wearing horns, and our minds have taken up a permanent residence in the gutter. Anyway, Horny Guy kept misleading us on some occasions, and making sure we didn't end up lost in the corn forever. At least...we think he was our tour guide...either that or we really caught his attention and he wanted to play...not really sure which one. But it was definitely fun. This section is 4 stars. [Aly says: I really liked this fact. Horny Man randomly disappeared, came back and had a really good sense of humor. Oh and he was barefoot. He's a cool kid. Even gave me an air high-five since the actors cannot touch you. I really liked having him around.]
Scare Factor
I cannot lie, the scare factor here was relatively low. There were a few times when the actors jumped out of the corn and startled us, and they earned a few screams from us, but altogether the haunt relies on the maze itself to induce fear. The fear of never getting out alive. And for a while, it feels very much like you won't get out. It can get frustrating and exhausting, but it's worth the effort. I wouldn't say I was really terrified, but it was enjoyable. For the Scare Factor I'd have to honestly give it 3 stars.
Actors
The actors were few and far between, aside from Horny Man. There was Jackie the Clown...I didn't like him much at all. But then again, I flippin hate clowns. He seemed to like me, though...at one point I had my face buried in Aly's boobs trying to hide from him. Which was nothing less than awkward. There were a few others, hiding in random places within the corn, ready to startle you, and they all stayed in character. Credit is due to these actors, because despite our heckling, sarcasm, and lame jokes, they never once broke character and had the creep-me-out factor going for them. We picked up a few friends who followed us around for a while, but they vanished like magic, reappearing sometimes when we least expected it. Kudos to the actors, especially Horny Man. (Hey, we couldn't have been an easy group to deal with!) I'll give it 4 stars here!
Overall Entertainment
There were a few pluses and a few things that took away from the overall score. It was entertaining, and we had a ton of fun. But the purpose of a haunted attraction is to scare, and while this place has lots of potential, it didn't elicit many real screams from our group. It was startling when actors jumped out, but that's not really fear, it's just catching us off guard. Again, there was a time when I thought the maze was never ending and I was ready to tap out, send up smoke signals, whatever it took to be escorted out of the maze because my legs were SCREAMING and we'd been walking in circles forever. It just wasn't the fear that I was personally hoping for. It was a HUGE improvement over the last visit, and this is no longer on the list of haunts we will never revisit willingly. In fact, I am fairly certain at least one or both of us will return next year. I did have to take into consideration it is opening weekend and there may be a few kinks to work out to get everything just right, and the fact that there was a monsoon the night before so the ground was slippery and difficult to maneuver for all of us. I can't hold that against any haunt, because as much as we'd all love to have that power, nobody can deflect the wrath of Mother Nature. I was very pleased with the vast improvements and entertainment, and I feel like as the haunt season progresses, the final kinks will be worked out. Ya know, timing and such.
The last time we went, I would have scored Cobb's Haunt generously at 1.5 stars. (Sorry guys, cold hard honest truth here.) This time, however, after much deliberation, we scored it at 4 Stars. SO much improvement, and a really entertaining evening! I can't wait to see what else these guys come up with and how their haunt continues to improve and impress.
Thanks to the owners, actors, and everyone who worked hard at designing and creating this attraction, then bringing it to life despite the crap weather we've been having.
Aly's Two Cents
Other than my bestie hiding in my boobies, I was really surprised by Cobb's Haunt (nothing surprises me when it comes to Ashley). I wasn't thrilled when we pulled up but... we are open minded people... usually. So its a long haul down to the maze, I HIGHLY recommend stopping at their very clean restrooms for spell before starting. And the dog is friendly. The scariest part for us was Jackie the Clown. Horny Man kept saying we "woke them." I had no idea who but then Jackie the Clown appeared and Ashley is TERRIFIED of clowns. I'm not. So it worked out well. I got a chuckle while Ashley screamed. For me, there was more of a "startle" factor. I don't much care for when the actors stand in front of you and don't let you by and there's not enough room to get around them without falling in the corn or touching them but noooo you can't touch them so you have to stand there and stare at them and it gets all awkward and stuff... I did like the random child who appeared out of no where. I'm still having nightmares about him! Oh, and if you go with your friends, make sure to say their name REALLY LOUD. The actors took the hint and started calling my name... totally creepy.
I think 4 stars is totally appropriate. The women at the front are awesome and they sell their "wares" from the farm. Its really neat. I don't know if the tour guide is a normal part of the haunt... or if we were lucky because it wasn't that busy. Either way, I recommend this one! They say it takes 25-45 minutes to get through... we apparently were a special case and took our sweet time! Cobb's Haunt has really improved and stepped their game up. I must say, we were pleasantly surprised.
Haunted Review - Danger Run (No Spoilers!)
It's finally here! The first review of the 2013 Haunted House season!! And as promised, Aly and I reviewed the Danger Run as well as the two haunts we visited. But no worries - we promise not to spoil any fun on this post!! We will be reviewing the haunts separately, so if you DON'T wanna know what two of the haunted attractions of Danger Run are, I strongly urge you to not read the next two reviews!! This one, however, will keep the secret.
First off, I have to say thank you to Danger Run for the opportunity to win free tickets on their Facebook Page. Aly and I were only able to go last night because of them, and they are SO incredibly appreciated!!
Now, on to the review:
The Clues
I will give major props to the designers of this route, the clues were tough and had us missing a turn because it took too long to figure it out, but they weren't unsolvable. I can't attest to the other routes (of which there are TWELVE!!) but ours was very well done. I will forever and always detest the one about "A liar would tell you a liar would say..." but after a few minutes of arguing and rationalizing (which is tough when you're driving along in the dark in the middle of nowhere with the overhead light glaring and obscuring your night vision) we were able to figure it out. We did take a wrong turn (or two...) but all in all, we were pretty proud of ourselves. The clues to the second haunt were a little...lacking. There weren't many clues, and I would hazard to guess it was because there really was no other way to make that long drive and still make it to both haunts in one night. We were even kind of glad for the mental break, being that it was pushing midnight when we got to the last haunt, but we weren't ready to stop solving clues.
The Route
Omigosh, I was impressed. I wasn't aware certain seemingly populated parts of the area even HAD a boondocks, but we were creeping along these narrow ass roads at twelve mph tops, freaking out about what the heck was around the next turn. One part held a pretty terrifying surprise as we damn near took out a couple of cows!!
Yeah. Cows. Hate them. HATE them. They're unnatural to me. Don't get me wrong, I love steak and hamburger and milk and all that, but in living form, they're terrifying to me. And I simply had to take a picture, although the cows had smartly moved off the road by the time I snapped it. Then while trying to get a better picture, I could have sworn I heard the warning that Jason was approaching. You know, "Ch-ch-ch-cah-cah-cah..." Yeah, I panicked, told Aly, "Uh, we need to go. Move. Now." And yanked my arms in the window again, earning me this shot:
Lol, yeah, I was that freaked. Then, of course, was the bridge. I had to share this one, because I'm not normally scared of bridges, but this one...we were a little worried that we'd be going for a swim or something was gonna crawl out of that water and get us. Yes, it was that scary. [Aly says: I don't think she is explaining this well enough... it was terrifying. Children of the corn and possessed cows staring at us. TER-I-FYING!! Seriously the best routes they've ever done. They worked really hard to find the scariest roads in the area. Kudos!]
The picture doesn't even do it justice. We had to use the bathroom when we got to the first haunt...
Now, I have to score it. Really, the only thing that pulled this experience down was the incredibly long drive without clues on our way to the second haunt. It was a bit of a drag, and while I'm fairly sure it wasn't the case, it just felt like the second half the designers gave up and said, "Eh, let's just get em there." Again, I'm sure it wasn't really like that, it was just the way it was perceived.
All in all, I'd say 4.5/5 stars, or 9/10 stars. (Why do I score out of 5 then out of 10? For the sake of the haunt workers to get the most accurate feedback. They read these too!!)
Danger Run really delivered this year, and when we visit again (hopefully soon!) I'm sure we won't be disappointed. Well done, Danger Run!! We had a blast! :)
The Score
Now, in all fairness, we DID review the two haunts on the Run, so you've been warned that the next two posts are SPOILER ALERTS!! Don't get mad at me if you don't heed my warnings and the veil of uncertainty is lifted prematurely!!!
Aly's Two Cents
I'm not going to lie... the Danger Run is what I look forward to every year. Not necessarily the haunts... but getting in a car with Ashley and having no idea where we are going or how to get there. No matter what, WE make it fun. However... this year... it was different. We really had fun! This was the first year we were scared ON THE RUN! (But seriously, how couldn't you be scared when cows are contemplating eating your brain? I really think that's what they were doing.) The team went through a lot of work this year finding awesome roads that were scary (much like they were promising on their Facebook page, if you stalk them like I do).
Ashley is always our navigator (which is scary) and I always drive (safety first). Most times, we get lost, roughly.... a thousand times. I am not sure if we are starting to understand their lingo, if we are getting smarter or it was just more obvious this year, but we only got lost three times. I think it made it more fun as well. Ashley and I didn't feel like killing each other when we got to the haunts and I didn't even threaten to make her walk the rest of the way (not even once!).
I totally agree with the 4.5 star rating on this one. And... since there are FOUR haunts this year on TWELVE routes, I think we will have to go again. The guys at the starting gates are really cool and you can even start from your house this year (I think we need to try that...). I definitely recommend this!!
~A
First off, I have to say thank you to Danger Run for the opportunity to win free tickets on their Facebook Page. Aly and I were only able to go last night because of them, and they are SO incredibly appreciated!!
Now, on to the review:
The Clues
I will give major props to the designers of this route, the clues were tough and had us missing a turn because it took too long to figure it out, but they weren't unsolvable. I can't attest to the other routes (of which there are TWELVE!!) but ours was very well done. I will forever and always detest the one about "A liar would tell you a liar would say..." but after a few minutes of arguing and rationalizing (which is tough when you're driving along in the dark in the middle of nowhere with the overhead light glaring and obscuring your night vision) we were able to figure it out. We did take a wrong turn (or two...) but all in all, we were pretty proud of ourselves. The clues to the second haunt were a little...lacking. There weren't many clues, and I would hazard to guess it was because there really was no other way to make that long drive and still make it to both haunts in one night. We were even kind of glad for the mental break, being that it was pushing midnight when we got to the last haunt, but we weren't ready to stop solving clues.
The Route
Omigosh, I was impressed. I wasn't aware certain seemingly populated parts of the area even HAD a boondocks, but we were creeping along these narrow ass roads at twelve mph tops, freaking out about what the heck was around the next turn. One part held a pretty terrifying surprise as we damn near took out a couple of cows!!
Yeah. Cows. Hate them. HATE them. They're unnatural to me. Don't get me wrong, I love steak and hamburger and milk and all that, but in living form, they're terrifying to me. And I simply had to take a picture, although the cows had smartly moved off the road by the time I snapped it. Then while trying to get a better picture, I could have sworn I heard the warning that Jason was approaching. You know, "Ch-ch-ch-cah-cah-cah..." Yeah, I panicked, told Aly, "Uh, we need to go. Move. Now." And yanked my arms in the window again, earning me this shot:
Lol, yeah, I was that freaked. Then, of course, was the bridge. I had to share this one, because I'm not normally scared of bridges, but this one...we were a little worried that we'd be going for a swim or something was gonna crawl out of that water and get us. Yes, it was that scary. [Aly says: I don't think she is explaining this well enough... it was terrifying. Children of the corn and possessed cows staring at us. TER-I-FYING!! Seriously the best routes they've ever done. They worked really hard to find the scariest roads in the area. Kudos!]
The picture doesn't even do it justice. We had to use the bathroom when we got to the first haunt...
Now, I have to score it. Really, the only thing that pulled this experience down was the incredibly long drive without clues on our way to the second haunt. It was a bit of a drag, and while I'm fairly sure it wasn't the case, it just felt like the second half the designers gave up and said, "Eh, let's just get em there." Again, I'm sure it wasn't really like that, it was just the way it was perceived.
All in all, I'd say 4.5/5 stars, or 9/10 stars. (Why do I score out of 5 then out of 10? For the sake of the haunt workers to get the most accurate feedback. They read these too!!)
Danger Run really delivered this year, and when we visit again (hopefully soon!) I'm sure we won't be disappointed. Well done, Danger Run!! We had a blast! :)
The Score
Now, in all fairness, we DID review the two haunts on the Run, so you've been warned that the next two posts are SPOILER ALERTS!! Don't get mad at me if you don't heed my warnings and the veil of uncertainty is lifted prematurely!!!
Aly's Two Cents
I'm not going to lie... the Danger Run is what I look forward to every year. Not necessarily the haunts... but getting in a car with Ashley and having no idea where we are going or how to get there. No matter what, WE make it fun. However... this year... it was different. We really had fun! This was the first year we were scared ON THE RUN! (But seriously, how couldn't you be scared when cows are contemplating eating your brain? I really think that's what they were doing.) The team went through a lot of work this year finding awesome roads that were scary (much like they were promising on their Facebook page, if you stalk them like I do).
Ashley is always our navigator (which is scary) and I always drive (safety first). Most times, we get lost, roughly.... a thousand times. I am not sure if we are starting to understand their lingo, if we are getting smarter or it was just more obvious this year, but we only got lost three times. I think it made it more fun as well. Ashley and I didn't feel like killing each other when we got to the haunts and I didn't even threaten to make her walk the rest of the way (not even once!).
I totally agree with the 4.5 star rating on this one. And... since there are FOUR haunts this year on TWELVE routes, I think we will have to go again. The guys at the starting gates are really cool and you can even start from your house this year (I think we need to try that...). I definitely recommend this!!
~A
Saturday, September 21, 2013
No haunted reviews just yet...
So, an unfortunate weather catastrophe and am illness prevented us from taking Danger Run (or any other haunted houses) last night. So we're gonna try again tonight, and hopefully the weather is friendlier and the illness is gone! Stupid monsoon in September...hehe. But on a good note, it's football season!! :)
I'll be back tonight to let y'all know what to expect. See ya soon!
Friday, September 20, 2013
In the Immortal Words of R.L. Stine...
Readers beware, you're in for a scare!!
If you read Goosebumps as a kid, your childhood was awesome.
That being said, today is opening night for the vast majority of the haunts in the Louisville Area. HELL YEAH!!! It's finally here, we've only been waiting eleven months for it!! Woo hoo!! **Does happy dance** Gah, I'm so excited, I can barely contain myself!!
Aly and I are headed out tonight to kick off the haunting season with a little Danger and a little Run. Considering this is the only kind of running this fluffy girl is gonna do (aside from that awkward attempt to run away from scary people in the haunts) still takes place in a car, you guessed it...DANGER RUN!!
We love the Run. Really. We get so flippin confused and lost, and we NEVER get close to the right mileage, but I'll be damned if we don't have the time of our lives doing it! We're starting tonight and good lord willin' we'll finish it tonight too. I can't WAIT to see what haunts are on the run this year. In case you missed an earlier post, there's a couple new things about the run this year.
1. You can start from your own driveway. That's pretty cool! They have the ability to customize your clues to navigate you to the first haunt from your driveway. Granted, I'm willing to wager that at some point it's going to take you by the closest Lowe's starting gate anyway, but still, an excellent option. We're not taking advantage of that one this time around, because we scored free tickets from their Freebie Friday's, so for the sake of convenience we're going to the starting gate. Like them on Facebook and watch out for Freebie Friday's for your chance to win free tickets too-they give them away every Friday through the last weekend of operation!!
2. There are FOUR (yes, that's right, FOUR) haunts on two separate trips. Each time you go on the Run you still only visit two haunts, but you can go on the run twice and hit up four haunts (or go ten times and experience so many different possibilities for getting lost and seeing some spooky stuffs!!) which is a really epic change! I will be going twice to get the full effect of the newly improved Run this year.
So, yeah, pretty awesomeness. I really can't wait, we're heading to the Hurstbourne Lowe's starting gate at around seven (I know, it won't be fully dark, and that's a little bit of a bummer, but we can't be out till 2am tonight. Stupid real life always seems to get in the way...but we're still psyched. I should have a review of Danger Run up on the blog by noon tomorrow, and SPOILER ALERT!!!! I will be reviewing the haunts on the Run separately, however they will be immediately after the Danger Run review. So, if you don't want to know what the haunts are, I recommend NOT reading the two haunted reviews until after you've gone on the Run. As much as I want everyone to read all my reviews, having no clue where you're going is a really big chunk of the fun of Danger Run.
If you've never been on the Run before and you're curious what it's like, head on over to Dangerrun.com and take the virtual Test Drive. Solve the clues, figure out which way to go, and get scared online before heading out to do it in your car!!
Looking forward to getting the sh*t scared out of us tonight, and hoping for a wonderful start to the haunted season!! Pleasant nightmares, my friends.
Monday, September 9, 2013
What's Happening on Friday the Thirteenth?
It's so close...can you smell the fear??
With Friday the 13th sneaking up on us, I'm debating on attending the Slenderman contest at Asylum Haunted Scream Park, but I have a bum knee that might make running away from this guy in the woods at night with only a flashlight prove much more harmful than fun. But I wanna do SOMETHING. I mean, Friday the 13th doesn't happen every month, ya know...lol! It's opening week for some haunts, with most of them opening next week or later.
What should I do this weekend to get the Halloween season started off right??
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